Book Title: How He Gets into Her Head : The Mind of the Male Intimate Abuser
Author: Bessel A. van der Kolk
Format: Paperback | 286 pages
Publication Date: 28 Dec 2012
Presenting some ground-breaking ideas, this book prompts a radical reappraisal of how we think about and understand male intimate abuse and violence. Over the last fifty years an array of resources and interventions have been brought to bear on domestic violence and abuse between intimate partners. Yet intimate abuse continues to be endemic in our society. One of the principal reasons for this lack of effective intervention is that we have ignored a critical ingredient which is the foundation of long-term intimate abuse and violence. This book uncovers the layers of covert tactics which men employ to establish and maintain control over their intimate partner. By deepening our understanding of what is going on the author suggests that we can develop a more efficient and consistent response to the issue. Working with both the perpetrators and victims of intimate partner abuse has given the author a unique insight into the tactics employed by the male abuser. He suggests that male intimate abuse and violence are driven by an entitlement to sexual priority and that the other tactics of control and violence are motivated by this entitlement.
It is this motivation that distinguishes male intimate violence from other forms of 'domestic violence' such as female to male violence and elder abuse. The author details the similarities in tactics and motivation between the paedophile and the male intimate abuser. He has found that by explaining these tactics to victims he has released many of them from the mind-control that they have experienced.